Early Childhood Development

Horses Cut Shop Factory

 Here at Horses Cut Shop we pride ourselves on quality, a productive work environment and employing the right tool for the job. This particular tool has fingers like Fred Flinstone’s toes. While this allows me to open pickle jars like an Olympian, it unfortunately hinders my ability to craft a t-shirt into a delicate loving package for delivery. I’m also a big proponent of early childhood development and on-the-job training. Combine that with summer vacation and the plethora of tiny hands running amok in the neighborhood and you’ve got yourself a workforce that’ll work for Gummy Bears and Knock-Knock jokes. If you have a child under ten who doesn’t ask a lot of questions that you’d like to send to Horses Life Skills Camp drop us a line.


Horses Cut Shop
Department of Childhood Learning

PS  No children were yelled at unnecessarily or without reason in the shooting of this photo.


The Rickshaw T-Shirt

My very first time was in college. I got too drunk. It would have been awkward even if I was sober. I didn’t know what I was doing. It lasted no more than three minutes but it couldn’t have been over fast enough. When it was over only one person appreciated it in the rear.

Karaoke at The Rickshaw is an exercise in humility and tenacity. That first time I did a real disservice to the sport and to Bob Seger in front of a packed house.  By nights end I was toe to toe with a woman from Spokane in a Tom Petty/Stevie Nicks number that turned a room full of hustling baboons into a drunken pipe organ of slurs and screams.  That and the Mu Shu is wicked good.


Horses Cut Shop
Department of the Performing Arts

Detroit’s Hardest

Horses Cut Shop got into the business of selling t-shirts from actual places because there is a lot of cool, down-to-earth ass kicking going on in America that people need to know about. Case and point: Detroit’s Downtown Boxing Gym.  Owner Carlo “Khali” Sweeney started this not-for-profit gym seven years ago to give Detroit’s youth a place belong and feel safe. But make no mistake, there is some serious learning going on here. Not only is the Downtown Boxing Gym home to several nationally ranked fighters but students of Sweeney’s gym have maintained a 100% high school graduation rate vs. a city wide 32%. And that’s no accident.

Downtown Boxing Gym T-Shirt

“I don’t care if they box or not. That’s not important to me. I want them to graduate from school. I want them to be self-sufficient. I want them to be able to, in any situation, make the best decision without being a follower. I want to create more leaders.” – Carlo Sweeney

The gym’s program maintains roughly sixty five students ranging in age from eight to eighteen, with dozens more on the waiting list.  Over seventy five percent of Carlo’s students live in a three mile radius of the gym located on the East side of Detroit, many of them residents of the nearby public housing units.

Being a registered non-profit, money is always an issue at the Downtown Boxing Gym but it has never been the goal so Horses is happy to help where we can . Like all the shirts we carry, a portion of the sale of this shirt will go back to support Carlo and the students at The Downtown Boxing Gym. Check out the shirt by clicking on the image or you can also make a donation straight to the gym on their website http://downtownyouthboxing.org/


Horses Cut Shop
Office of The Sweet Science

Size Matters

Horses Cut Shop has gone through great lengths to ensure that our t-shirts fit like a nice, long grope from a beautiful stranger. All shirts are 100% cotton and made right here in the USA to satisfy your inner Riffraff. That being said, we receive a lot of questions regarding fit and how to shop for just the right size. The following text it pulled from our website in the sizing section. May it answer all your burning questions.


What is a “size”, really, besides a judgment. For the most part we can’t help what our size is. Sure, maybe we eat too much or have a soft spot for that tape worm that robs us of our nutrition but, by and large, we are who we are and when it comes to fitting you with a t-shirt, Horses has you covered.

Xtra Xtra Large: This is as big as we go. An XXXL shape could wear the XXL but he’d have to be careful on the pull-up bar as the more than two and a half feet of garment between the neck and groin is going to hike up no matter how we stitch it. And unless you’re Lyle Alzado (God rest his soul) you’ve most likely got a little partner down around the middle who’s going to get a face full of air if you try. That said, our XXLs are stitched just like the smaller sizes with a healthy allotment of thread on the seams to keep your Lou Ferigno physique under wraps during brawls, jail breaks and late night horse play.

Xtra Large: Rumor has it that Denzel Washington wears an XL. I don’t by it. My cousin has a friend who delivers pipe to some of the production houses down in LA and he said Denzell needed an extra hand stepping up onto a tailgate of a taco truck. The XL is the go-to size when you’re big enough to be mistaken for an athlete but still small enough to see your pecker in the shower.

Large: Meet the white bread of shirt sizes. This is, hands down, our most popular size. It fits like a large, and provides enough options for a medium sized guy to over-eat or contract some swelling in the joints and still look like a champ. An XL can easily drop down to a L if he can still fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run (thank you Rudyard Kippling).

Medium: The mediums among us are a lucky lot. Their silhouette is ripe for being an on-screen actor, fighter pilot, guitar tech or teen idol. This breed of men will find our M size to be right up their alley. Our stitching is optimized for this fit and allows the wearer a full 360 degree range of movement if they can somehow pull that off physiologically.

Small: Slight, wily, pocket-sized… call it like you will but make no mistake, just because something is small doesn’t mean it won’t royally fuck you up. (Please see” fire crackers, Bruce Lee, Kidney Stones.) We take great pride in providing a solid garment for our modest friends. Same quality print, but with less to catch on fire.

Horses Cut Shop
Department of Garment Science

Sharks & Sink Holes

After the movie Jaws debuted in 1975, a whole generation of kids refused to go into water. Saltwater, fresh water, bathwater, it made no difference. “That thing looked like a fin”. I’m still traumatized. Thanks Speilberg. But now a whole new generation of kids is going to experience their own irrational, media-born fear:  Yes Virginia, you can be swallowed by the earth while sleeping. Don’t believe me?  Some poor slumbering bastard in Central Florida vanished into a sinkhole Thursday night and they still haven’t found the guy. The rescue crews won’t go near the place claiming the whole area is unstable. Plausible explanation but the smart money’s on the fact that most of those rescuers were sitting in a movie house in 1975 and are still looking over their shoulders while swimming.

Horses Cut Shop
Office of Irrational Fears

Running Down Hill

This last day of 2012 will also be Horses last days in the storefront of Treasure & Bond in New York City. How it came to be that a business with no business first introduced itself to the world at large in a window-front in lower Manhattan is a cautionary tale and required reading for first offenders and anyone who’s big on self bludgeoning. That is to say, it’s been a harried, unmapped road. And we’d have no other way.

When I was ten I accidentally hit a police officer with a water balloon. I can recall the terror of a brief chase punctuated by my running full speed down a very steep hill. The sensation of knowing that gravity owns you and that to avert disaster you must summon your reach is a primal fear that comes in handy in heady times.  That hybrid sense of reckless calculation and survival through sheer will is a standard indication of the American dream and the trait I love most in people. That and the willingness to head out at night with sunglasses for the sunrise.

Thanks to the cosmos and friends new and old for helping this ship off the beach. Next stop the open ocean.


Horses Cut Shop
Office of New Year’s Metaphors

Major Keith Knievel

Keith_Knievel4In outer space it’s standard operating procedure to put your best spaceman forward. No alien race is going to send their average green man-on- the-street to visit another world because that other world might get the wrong idea and all flying-saucer-hell could break loose.
It is in this spirit that Horses Cut Shop announces Operation Skull Rider. In 2013 Horses Cut Shop will be launching the DNA of Evel Knievel and Keith Richards into deep space for the benefit of all eternity. No need to thank us now, Universe.  you’re welcome.
We have it on good authority that The Russians are selling space on their June mission for $1,200 Canadian and the patent for Parachute Pants. In oder to raise these monies we’ve created a limited edition t-shirt inspired by this operation and our undying appreciation for two of Mother Earth’s finest by-products. Each person who buys a shirt will have their name micro-engraved on the space canister which will be carried into deep space by a monkey from Minsk working the forward controls.


Horses Cut Shop
Office of Space Population

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What’s A Dago?

Besides being magic, a Dago is a an Italian sausage patty, peppers, cheese and tomato sauce on a roll. In its piece parts a Dago sounds rather pedestrian but trust a guy who’s had three square meals of Dagos on a single, sunny Minnesota Friday, it’s wicked little number, and nobody makes one like Pat, the owner of Dusty’s Bar in Nordeast, Minneapolis. Just go ahead and Google Dago Sandwich: Pat owns the category. Started by Pat’s father back in 1952, Dusty’s Dago’s & Liquors remains the lone hold out in the much storied “Nordeast” neighborhood that once thrived in the shadow of the historic Grain Belt Brewery before it closed back in the 70′s. …View More